Establishing Family Boundaries

As much as addiction takes an emotional and often financial toll on the whole family, it affects everyone in a unique way. No two people will have the same addiction experiences or identical journeys to recovery.

Addicts can be manipulative and take advantage of those around them to get what they want.

When a loved one’s addiction has been the centre of attention for a long time, it can be difficult for family members to respect and recognise the importance of personal boundaries.

Know your limits

We know seeing a loved one struggle with addiction is distressing. It’s natural to want to support your loved one but giving them money or letting them get away with bad behaviour may be enabling their addiction.

People in active addiction can be volatile and unpredictable. As the parent or partner of an addict, trying to be supportive without understanding addiction can get you into hot water and even debt. It’s normal to be angry, scared or confused about what is happening and it’s ok to ask for help.

At the Hader Clinic QLD we can provide support to recognise family issues caused by or contributing to the current situation, understand what your loved one is going through, and know how you can offer love without enabling addiction.

We can also support you with a family intervention to start your loved one on their journey to recovery.

Set realistic goals and expectations

Addiction and recovery are very personal experiences.

Through counselling and therapy an addict will confront their own behaviour and start to accept responsibility. This process takes time. For many addicts the process is repeated throughout different stages of life and recovery.

Recognising that recovery is a journey with no set timeframe is important for all members of the family.

It’s essential for your loved one ,and for your own sake, to set realistic expectations and goals. They may be to do with family life, such as sharing a weekly meal, or to do with the process of recovery, like attending a certain number of support group sessions each week.

Our family therapy sessions can help you establish and maintain healthy family boundaries and agree on a plan of action if things go wrong.

Recognise your own trauma

Addiction affects everyone in the family so it’s not only the addict who needs support.

Family therapy and individual counselling can help you identify family issues related to your loved one’s addiction.

Family therapy can help individual members of the family understand the personal effect of addiction and work through the recovery process. It allows you to talk openly with a professional and supportive counsellor about the impact of your loved one’s addiction on your relationship with them and on your life.

Remember, it’s natural to be concerned about your loved one and to be uncertain about what will happen in the future.

Recognising the affect of addiction on everyone in the family will help you to move forward and in time rebuild your family relationships.